Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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