if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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