Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
You are a genius and a whore.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
