um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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