508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Randomize
