just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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