I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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