It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
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