He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize