I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
