Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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