The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
i think im in europe. pls send help
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
