You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
