Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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