i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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