Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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