Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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