dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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