its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
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