Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize