His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
you had me at cake vodka
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
