Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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