What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Randomize
