I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Randomize