shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
