Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
