So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
