I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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