um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize