And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
