sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Randomize