I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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