it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
