You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
