im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
How naked do you want me to be?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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