Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
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