Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
