theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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