So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
Let the clothes fall where they may.
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