I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Randomize
