This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
so much tequila, so little girl.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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