yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
they're like a gay fantastic four
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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