Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Randomize