It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
