I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
