whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
