He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
