Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize