I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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