you would pick up someone in the library
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize
